The Rapture
I happened to have the day off for the rapture. I enjoyed an English Muffin and a cup of coffee wondering what events might unfold during the day. I decided not to wait on my husband to enjoy this last and final day off so I left before he awoke.
I’ve been spring cleaning and home improving so I took to the larger hardware stores for ideas. For what? I’m not sure. A dog fence would be ideal, but as a renter, not to wise of an investment. On the way I saw that the Farmer’s Market at the Nuui Cunni Center was open. I hadn’t been before. Then, when I arrived to Lake Isabella, I saw the flea market was open. I hadn’t been there before, either.
Two new experiences on the day of the rapture. How perfect. Before parking in the lot, I saw two men bearing crosses walking down the street. Are you kidding me? I’m not sure if Jesus found it insulting that they wheeled, YES, wheeled their crosses down the sidewalk while they casually chatted with each other about the end times, but I DID. What kind of homage is that?
I hoped to see them at some point, but they were gone when I parked at the hardware store. I wandered down every aisle. Even the plumbing, then bought a dill plant and left. I found the garden center manager a bit brash trying to push a one gallon tomato plant on me because they didn’t have larger ones already caged, as I requested. He threatened that they may never be available again.
I hadn’t thought of it then, but his strange attitude was rather approprot for the day of the coming. Jerk. Did he really think it necessary to make that one last sale?
Afterward, I walked to the flea market still hoping for the chosen ones to come around. I didn’t find anything but homemade cookies which I ate far too many of, but we won’t be needing skinny jeans where we’re headed. I then took to the second hardware store where, again, I found nothing. I was hoping for the farmer’s market, but when I arrived half an hour before closing, nearly everyone had gone home. I’d spent to long with the lawn and garden guy talking about my tomato plant purchase that included buying a strawberries and asparagus plant. If I get one good turn out of them I’m spending as much as I would at the grocery store, so why not?
Perhaps, you say, because “it’s the end times, dummy!” Oh, good point. But if I survive the next five weeks of natural disasters, I’ll have my own food in the event of road collapses and power outages. I didn’t even think of that, but my husband pointed it out when I took him back down to Lake Isabella to buy some power bars and he saw a man wheeling a cross down the sidewalk. “What’s that?” he said. “Oh, it’s the Rapture today, didn’t you know?” I said. “You knew this was happening and you didn’t bring your camera?” he asked.
Oh, my mistake.
